I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
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She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
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I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!