I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
