dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize