brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Randomize
