So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize