Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize