Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize