It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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