You really coming over, don't trick.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
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Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
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It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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