shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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