He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
