my mouth tastes like poor choices
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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