I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
