My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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