too bad you live with your parents still
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize