He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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