In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
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