i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
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We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
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Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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