the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize