Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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