I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
