And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Randomize
