what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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