My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
