what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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