i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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