The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize
