Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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