Walk of Shame. In a state park.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
A bitchslap is in order.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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