either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
