im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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