Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
foreskin is a definite game changer
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize