Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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