At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize