i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Dating After Heartbreak
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own