Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Dude my mom stole all your condoms

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(251): View more from Alabama

Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?

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(402): View more from Nebraska

as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.

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These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable
Read it at the TFLN blog
(402): View more from Nebraska

The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO

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(770): View more from Georgia

I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(

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(616): View more from Michigan

so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy

(313): View more from Michigan

Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle

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(440): View more from Ohio

you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?

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