That's when you crack a 10am beer
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
