no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Is Oprah even human
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
