Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
