worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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