I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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