It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
