You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize