I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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