saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
