He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba