glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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