y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
