They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize