She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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