so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
